Category / Mindfulness Exercise

by Karen Twinem

Ignore Your Inner Critic

Do you remember a time when you were told who you are? It’s nice to hear that you’re kind or smart. But sometimes you hear that you are clumsy, stupid, ungrateful or worthless.

Where do those names go? Yes, they are still in your head. And often they become part of the inner critic who doesn’t like much of what you do. Today’s Christian mindfulness exercise is helping us to recognize that your inner critic is talking and to learn how to stop listening to it.

It is all part of detachment, the art of experiencing feelings without allowing them to control you. Numbing out feelings is unhealthy. That’s not what I’m suggesting. Detachment steps in to allow us to make choices about our thoughts and actions. In Christian mindfulness, we allow ourselves to walk with Jesus and to do God’s will.

Learning to focus on the presence of God helps us to recognize the negative impact of our inner critic. We do what we should do, regardless of how we feel. This allows us to be loving to people we don’t like and to participate in situations where we have felt awkward in the past. We can do hard things with hard people.

The first step is to pray. Ask God to help you listen to your thoughts. Spend some time writing down what you hear. Are you getting criticism and ridicule? That’s the inner critic. Be aware of what the inner critic sounds like. Keep a list of what you hear, if that helps. These hurtful statements from the past have little to do with your identity in Christ.

Once we recognize our inner critic’s voice, we need to deliberately ignore it. When the words arise, pray before you take any action. Ask for an increase in God’s presence. And turn your thoughts towards praise and gratitude. Then do the next right thing.

Ignoring your inner critic can help you to detach from emotional reactions and walk in the ways of peace.

by Karen Twinem

Think: It Could Be the Last Time

My former boss died last week. I worked for her for 13 years. She taught me how to be a communications strategist, how to embrace New York, and how to deal with difficult people without losing your cool. We went through her divorce, the deaths of her parents, my son’s disability, and the deaths of my father and sister-in-law. I have many good memories and a little sadness from difficult times.

The last time I saw her was at a Christmas party just before the pandemic. She was busy with a client, and I needed to leave. So I stood near her, waiting for an opening. It was brief. I gave her a hug and wished her well. I don’t remember what she said to me. It was the last time I saw one of the most monumental people in my life.

Sometimes we are fully conscious that we are saying goodbye to a loved one. It was so at my dad’s deathbed when they took him off a ventilator. My mother, brother, sister and I watched him take his last breath in full awareness of the finality of the moment.

But those times are rare.

This Christian mindfulness exercise helps us be less cavalier about seeing your loved ones. It’s simple: Just remind yourself that this could be the last time you talk to them. This sounds like Debbie Downer created the exercise, but it also helps you to be more aware of the person. After all, death comes to 100% of us, and not always in the order we were expecting.

We are often distracted, particularly around our family. We half-listen. We get annoyed. We don’t recognize how important every interaction is. I even think this colors our reaction when we lose someone to death. I wish I’d known … I wish I’d said … I wish we’d gotten past this.

Try listening to a loved one with the idea that it could be the last time. It makes the future better.

by Karen Twinem

Overcome Election Anxiety

Bombarded with fears about what will happen to the United States? Feeling the crush of election anxiety? You’re not alone.

I am a registered Independent because neither party has a platform that I fully endorse. I dislike the lack of civility, the tone of campaigning and the name-calling that has infiltrated our political system. And I’ve experienced fears for our democracy that I never expected to have in my life. As Sarah Young writes in “Jesus Listens,” “People are calling evil good and good evil.” This leads to anxiety.

Jesus does not want us to lead lives filled with dread. So we have to deal with anxiety thought by thought by thought. We can be sure this is possible because Paul tells us to “take captive every thought.” (2nd Corinthians 2:5) Christian mindfulness makes it easier to fulfill this advice.

To take your thoughts captive and overcome anxiety, you have to do five things repeatedly: Notice. Stop. Pray. Refocus. Act.

NOTICE: Listen to your thoughts. We know that paying attention on purpose helps us to listen to the chatter in our minds. It’s a good thing, too, because our thoughts direct our emotions. Whenever we get wound up in anxiety, bad thoughts are at the core.

STOP: Take a few deep, slow breaths.

PRAY: Once we feel a bit more calm, we need to pray for God’s grace to help us keep focused on Him. You can pray:

Lord, help me to not be overcome by uncertainty and fear. Help me not to wallow in fears of evil. I know none of what’s happened is a surprise to you. I know in the end You will triumph. And I know that I may not even be understanding this correctly. Instead, I trust in you as my constant companion.

REFOCUS: God wants us to focus on His presence in the moment. So visualize Jesus alongside you. Think about God’s character and all the ways He is with you. Focus on God’s goodness.

ACT: God wants us to be a light shining in the darkness. You can do this if you practice the presence of God. If you seek His will for what you should do to become a force for good. Fill your calendar with things that you know God wants you to do. Such as?

  • Spiritual practices, such as all types of prayer, Bible study, Sabbath, gifts of your time and money, and intentional Christian fellowship in church and small group.
  • The seven spiritual works of mercy: Counsel the doubtful. Instruct the ignorant. Admonish the sinner. Comfort the sorrowful. Forgive all injuries. Bear wrongs patiently. Pray for the living and the dead.
  • Acts of corporal mercy to address the needs of the poor and helpless: Feed the hungry. Visit the imprisoned. Buy clothing for those who need it. Care for the sick. Shelter travelers. Offer drink to the thirsty.
  • And what you say. If you can’t communicate in ways that show the gifts of the Holy Spirit, be quiet. Talk to God about your concerns, instead of dumping them on family, friends and social media.

Focus on the good you can do. God has prepared works in advance for you to do. As you become a force for good, your anxiety melts away.

woman picking up cell phone
by Karen Twinem

Think When You Reach for Your Phone

Here’s a shocking statistic: Average Americans check their cell phone 344 times per day. About once every four minutes.

That statistic comes from a survey by reviews.org. I tried to find information that disproved it, and I couldn’t.

Our addiction to picking up the phone is scary and mindless. Christian mindfulness offers us an opportunity to approach our cell phones with curiosity. And to slow down the obsessive behavior.

Here’s a two-step practice that can help:

  1. Catch yourself when you pick up your phone casually.
  2. Ask yourself: “Why did I pick up the phone?” Are you bored? Are you worried? Is your job (or a person at your job, like your boss) getting to you?
  3. Pray about that condition. If you are truly bored, find a way to be a force for good at work and at home? Are you at work all the time now? Is that what God wants?

Once you start to think each time you pick up your phone, you will find yourself reducing the pattern. It’s addictive behavior, which is never good.

You also can make some guidelines for yourself about your phone usage. Here are some ideas:

  • Create specific ringtones for key people in your family and at work so you only react to texts from them.
  • Set a specific time to check the phone for emails and other texts.
  • Reduce or eliminate notifications for other things.
  • Use the do-not-disturb feature. (You can make exceptions for key people, such as a kid in college or an elderly parent.)
  • Turn your smart phone into a dumb phone by eliminating most apps.

Take a moment to think about why you pick up your phone. It can improve your life.

by Karen Twinem

Christian Mindfulness in Exercise

Research shows that people who focus on the sensations of exercise and on their surroundings enjoy the experience more. Christian mindfulness can support our exercise program, and the exercise program can build our Christian mindfulness.

How can we do it?

  1. Pray before your exercise, offering thanks for the body you have been given.
  2. Unplug. Exercise without music or other input so you can focus on the experience.
  3. Pay attention to the changes you feel as you exercise: changes and strains in your muscles, your mood and emotions, your breathing and all else you experience.
  4. Notice pain and decide what to do about it. Be nice to yourself.
  5. Observe the surroundings, whether they are nature or the walls of a room.
  6. Listen to your thoughts. Are you in dread? Watching the clock? Feeling competitive with others around you?
  7. As you cool down, offer gratitude for your body, inside and out.

Exercise can be many things, ranging from an addiction to an experience to avoid as much as possible. Bringing Christian mindfulness into the activity can add some calm and clarity to it.

by Karen Twinem

Insects: A Mindfulness Exercise

Insects in the summer used to just bug people. Now, concern about reduced number of bees and other insects give us all a chance to practice mindfulness. And to be thankful for their place in God’s plan for Earth.

This idea first developed when I learned about a study in the journal Biological Conservation in April 2019. It said about 40% of insect species are threatened with extinction. Wow! It turns out that scientists have been concerned about the reduced number of insects for several years.

In its January 2021 issue, the science journal Proceedings of the National Academies of Science (PNAS) put together a series of 12 separate studies from 56 scientists in several countries about insect populations. University of Illinois entomologist May Berenbaum equated the issue to the first studies on climate change 30 years ago. She said insects are critical to the natural food chain and pollinate human crops. On the other hand, many humans hate them.

These studies were released about the same time that I developed skeeter syndrome. Yes, that’s a real thing. It means that I am allergic to the saliva of mosquitos. Each bite swells up into a small mountain on my skin that itches and hurts for weeks.

Searching for prayers about insects also was informative. Almost all of them were prayers to make insects go away, rather than be fruitful and multiply. While I may want the mosquitos to stay away from me, I also want them to exist. Even if they are sometimes identified as the deadliest life form on Earth, God has a purpose for them.

Be thankful for insects

So how can we bring Christian mindfulness to insects? The easiest way is to notice them and pray for them. I have adapted two prayers that I found online. The first one, which I changed into modern English, is about bees:

Lord God, Almighty, you created heaven and earth, and all the animals that live in the air and on the earth for the use of man. You have directed that the ministers of Your holy Church should light candles made of beeswax when the holy sacrifice is offered in which the Sacred Body and Blood of Jesus Christ, Your Son, becomes present and is consumed. Send down Your blessing on these bees, that they may multiply, be fruitful and be preserved from all harm so that the product of their labor may be used to Your honor, and to the honor of Your Son, and the Holy Spirit, and the most blessed Virgin Mary. Through the same Christ our Lord. Amen.

catholic.org

Another prayer I found online begins like this:

May compassion and love reign over all the earth for all the tiny beings who live in the soil, the trees, the water, and the air, creating harmony and balance with your songs, your pollinating of flowers, your graceful flight, your mysterious transformations, and your miraculous ability to literally create soil in which new plants can take root.

allcreatures.org blog

Five ways to help insects survive

A mindful approach to insects also could include helping them survive. Here are five ideas I found:

  1. Reduce the number of times you mow your grass.
  2. Plant native plants. Many insects need these to survive.
  3. Avoid pesticides and go organic in your yard and garden.
  4. Leave old trees, stumps and dead leaves alone. They are home to countless species.
  5. Support and volunteer in conservation organizations.

The Lord made insects as part of His plan for planet Earth. Let’s help Him keep them alive.

a yellow bird in a tree
by Karen Twinem

Play First Bird of My Day

“First Bird of My Day” is a worldwide game that began when an English woman decided to be mindful about which bird she saw first each day.

In the May 2022 issue of The Simple Things magazine, Hannah Bourne-Taylor told her story. It began when she and her husband moved to a remote village in Ghana for his work. She felt depressed and disconnected at first. Then she noticed that the birds around her were unfamiliar and beautiful.

As she began to learn about them, she began a mindfulness practice of looking outside each morning to note what bird she saw first. When the family returned to England, Hannah began sharing her game on Twitter using the hashtag #firstbirdofmyday. (Her Twitter handle is @WriterHannahBT)

Over time, people around the world have started playing the game. On the day I wrote this, one man was sharing a map of everyone’s first birds on the Twitter hashtag. She even gets posts from Antarctica, which the bird mentioned is often a penguin.

Creating mindful routines and rituals like this can build mindfulness and add joy to life. Those of us practicing Christian mindfulness also can pray over the first bird and its winged brethren. Due to the global climate change, many species are experiencing declines. We can thank God for the birds, which Jesus loved to observe, and pray for their future.

boy listening to sea shell
by Karen Twinem

Go Outside and Listen

Listen. One of the pandemic’s benefits has been an increase in the amount of time spent in nature. In fact, researchers at the Max Planck Institute for Human Development used the pandemic to study the benefits of time in the fresh air.

The results were even better than expected. Not only did spending time outdoors improve general well-being, but it also altered and improved brain structure. The areas of the brain impacted affect mood, concentration and working memory. Spending time in nature could not be a better idea.

Christian mindfulness practices are all easy to adapt to the outdoors. One of simplest is mindful listening to the quiet around you. Is silence ever really silent? Tuning into the sounds around you is a great way to stay in the present moment. And hearing those sounds offers opportunities for prayers of gratitude and worship for the world God made.

The practice is simple.

  • Go to a place outside where you can feel safe and relaxed.
  • Close your eyes, if you’d like, and listen to the sounds of your own breathing first.
  • Thank God for this opportunity to be in His creation.
  • Listen to the sounds as they occur. Hear them come and go.
  • If you identify a sound of something you love (a robin, for example), praise God for it.
  • Notice how this impacts your mood and your body.
  • Close with a time of worship by thinking about the creation around you.

It’s like your mother said: Go outside and play. It’s good for you.

by Karen Twinem

Try Radical Acceptance

Your mind is labeling everyone and everything, but you may not even notice. Yet those labels or judgments show up when you interact with people.

Have you ever noticed that you suspend disbelief when you listen to Person A but react with cynicism to what Person B says? Does walking down a particular hallway make you feel stressed?

You can become more aware of this with this Christian mindfulness exercise. It helps us to not behave on automatic pilot, but to become more aware. That way we can walk through our day with Jesus, not our half-buried emotions, leading the way.

  1. Pray to ask God to give you the ability to listen, really listen, to your automatic thoughts. Ask for blessing for this exercise, which you can do all day or just for a few hours.
  2. Be open to surprises and new insights. You may know how much you dread seeing one supervisor. (I used to have a boss with the company nickname “Attila the Hen.”) But you may not know how you automatically feel toward people who cause you less auto-stress.
  3. On a “typical” day, listen to what jumps into your mind when you see individuals, attend groups or go places. For example, walk through the halls of your office space, and notice what you are quietly saying to yourself. How does it feel when you see This Person or pass That Person’s office door? Does a certain room or sight make you feel uneasy automatically?
  4. Acknowledge these emotions. We don’t want to run away from our feelings. We want to be aware of them so we will not behave on automatic pilot.
  5. Realize that you can’t control your emotions, other people or situations. But you can accept that you have some emotional reactions to people and places. And you can control your actions. asking for the grace to walk with Jesus through our daily activities.

This is part of “radical acceptance.” Introduced into American culture by Tara Brach, the concept is used in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). It is a close relative of mindfulness. We pay attention to only what is happening in the present moment (mindfulness) in the presence of God (Christian mindfulness), and we accept that we cannot control reality (radical acceptance).

By realizing the reality of the emotions that we have attached to people and places, we can bring those feelings to Jesus and make a more sound decision about what to do. It’s a good idea to conduct this exercise quarterly or whenever you experience a significant change in your surroundings.

by Karen Twinem

Beat Burnout

As we enter the third year of the pandemic, burnout is everywhere. The American Psychological Association, in its 2021 Work and Well-Being Survey, found a frightening level of burnout that’s no surprise to most people.

The survey found that 79 percent of employees surveyed had work-related stress in the previous 30 days. The occupations reporting the highest levels of burnout were (again, no surprise here) health care and education. But the symptoms of burnout spread across most occupations. The level of negative impacts reported include:

  • 44% had physical fatigue (a 38% increase since 2019)
  • 36% had cognitive weariness
  • 32% reported emotional exhaustion
  • 26% felt lack of interest, motivation or energy
  • 19% reported lack of effort at work

So what is exactly is burnout? Back in 2019, the World Health Organization defined it as a syndrome resulting from workplace stress that has not been successfully managed. It has three dimensions:

  • Feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion
  • Increased mental distance from one’s job or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one’s job
  • Reduced professional efficacy

Is this you?

Three Christian mindfulness practices to fight burnout

Just One Thing: Pick one task a day to perform with Christian mindfulness. Pray before and after. Ask God to be present with you as you do the task. Focus your full attention on the work in the presence of God. You could change tasks each day.

Ask for Change: Starting a new job is generally exciting, if somewhat stressful, because there is so much to learn. Use prayer and reflection to think about what new thing you’d like to learn. Or what new responsibility you’d like to take on. Come up with a proposal about how to learn to do those things. Take it to your boss, who may be happy to help if just to get you to stay.

Add a Prayer Break: Adding a five or 10-minute prayer break to your day is fairly easy. Mark it on the schedule, using a code word if necessary. Then stop to pray for your work, upcoming meetings, your co-workers and your organization’s mission. You may feel more purpose and insight when you get back to your work.

Be sure to bring your burnout into the healing power of Christian mindfulness. It will help you decide if it’s time to join the Great Resignation or if you just need to make a change in your current job.