Tag / mindfulness

Christian woman praying thinking
by Karen Twinem

What Jesus Wants You to Think

Jesus is clear about what he wants you to think. Philippians 4:8 says:

Finally, brothers (and sisters), whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable … if anything is excellent or praiseworthy … think about such things.

That, we all know, isn’t easy. So how do we control our thoughts when our emotions are running the show? Yet, God wants us to change our thinking, so it must be possible. As Paul writes in Romans 12:2 (NIV):

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.

The New Living translation puts it this way: Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Sanctification is never finished in our lifetimes. So we need to recognize that we cannot control our thoughts without God’s help. He alone will help us to replace the harsh critic in our brains with a loving observer.

It’s a great path to developing humility. We have to recognize that we do not have the ability to master our own minds. We are not as mentally strong nor as fabulous as we think we are. Using the discipline of detachment can stop us from being surprised at our own thoughts. We are not good enough, on our own, to ensure that our thoughts are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy.

As we offer the control of our thoughts over to the Holy Spirit, we can begin to watch our own minds. We can observe our thoughts as God does – with gentleness and compassion. With HIs help, we develop an early detection system to see when we are going astray. Just as detachment helps us to pause enough to decide how to react to a bad situation, it also lets us what the stream of thoughts flow and decide if they are going in the right direction.

Linda Kavelin Popov wrote a book called “The Family Virtues Guide: Simple Ways to Bring Out the Best in Our Children and Ourselves.” I used her ideas raising my kids. I have a quote from her that I wrote on an index card long again, so it’s probably from that book. It said:

“We can choose to engage in the Troubled Cs – control, criticism, contempt or contention – or act on our virtues of acceptance, appreciation and assertiveness.”

I like that. Acceptance and appreciation are paths to thoughts that are true, noble, right, pure and so on. And assertiveness gives us the courage to voice those good thoughts to people who might not want to hear them.

So let us bring Jesus’ eyes, ears and ideas to our thought life. We aren’t holy enough for it to go perfectly. But the Holy Spirit is there to help us.

low angle view of pink flowers against blue sky
by Karen Twinem

Smell Spring

Spring is the only time you can do this simple mindfulness exercise: Go outside and smell spring.

Many of us are having vacillating weather this year. So you can smell all kinds of things: a late snow, the pungent smell of mulch, the hint of rain in the air.

Spring is the time to open your windows, air out your comforter and sniff the lilacs. Read under a tree if you can. Any of your favorite breathing exercises becomes even more refreshing with all the scents in the area. You can find some ideas here.

Full disclosure: I am allergic to trees, grass and many plants God created. But I won’t let that stop me from enjoying this season. So I have to be especially mindful about enjoying the smells, which tend to be full of pollen. I take a pill, insert some nasal spray and head out to sniff until it’s time to come in. Or I stand by the window smelling the rain and wind.

All of these smells are God’s work. He invented scent and created a special smell for every living thing. I love to smell the musk of my cat’s fur, the intoxicating scent of hyacinths and the signature fragrance of the first rose of the season.

Be mindful of all the smells of spring and give thanks for each one you detect. That kind of Christian mindfulness can water the kindness and joy in your soul. You may find yourself writing a happy text to a friend or listening intently to your child, all as an outpouring from the freshness of your soul.

The smells of spring come just for a few weeks a year. Let’s rejoice and give thanks for them.

by Karen Twinem

Spend Good Friday With Jesus

Spend Good Friday with Jesus. He appreciates your company. You can spend the time doing these things:

Fast. Perhaps eat some soup for lunch.

Visit the Stations of Cross. This step-by-step remembrance of Jesus’ journey to death is found in most Catholic churches and in many others, too. If you can’t go visit one, you can watch one on YouTube.

Light a candle. Begin at noon.

Pray. Go before the Lord as you consider your own sins that He is carrying as He dies. Seek His forgiveness and His peace.

Read the story. “A Harmony of the Gospels” , available in a variety of translations and formats, aligns all four of Jesus’ eyewitness biographies to take you through the day … and through His life.

Meditate. Think about the sentences Jesus spoke from the cross.

  • Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.
  • Today you shall be with me in paradise.
  • Woman, behold your son! Behold, your mother!
  • My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?
  • I thirst.
  • It is finished.
  • Father, into your hands I commend my spirit.

Blow out the candle at 3 p.m.

Attend a Good Friday service at your church of choice.

Your presence with Jesus makes Him happy. Just imagine that.

by Karen Twinem

Experience Awe This Lent

Let the whole world fear the Lord, and let everyone stand in awe of Him.

Psalm 33:8

Experiencing awe while in the presence of God is in decline as a Christian practice. Some Christians address God as a friend, a buddy or even a sweetheart. Casual prayers dominate small group meetings. “Oh hi, God. How’s it going?” More liturgical churches quote the words, but have lost the meaning. So why not deliberately experience awe this Lent.

I define awe as “reverential respect mixed with fear or wonder.” Awe is similar to “fear of the Lord.” Scripture commands us to experience God with awe. And, no surprise, awe also is important for human emotional health.

According to a 2018 white paper that the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley prepared for the John Templeton Foundation, experiencing awe is, yes, awesome. The experience often puts people in a self-transcendent state where they focus less on themselves and feel more like a part of a larger whole.

The study found that the individualistic culture of the United States impacts how Americans experience awe. Research by Dr. Michael Amster (co-author of “The Power of Awe“) found Americans less likely than most cultures to have those experiences at all. And, when they do, they are more likely to experience awe over personal accomplishments, the white paper reports.

People who are extraverted, open to new experiences, and/or wise more likely experience awe. It can also come over us during threat-based experiences, such as the September 11th attacks or the eureka moments like the Earthrise photo taken by an astronaut in 1968 showing Earth from the moon’s perspective for the first time. Other awe-inspiring things:

  • Moral acts of courage and bravery
  • Beauty in art, music and nature
  • Collective experiences that become euphoric
  • Observation of birth or death

And, of course, awe comes from religious experiences.

A Famous Awe Experience

I recently read “Man’s Search for Meaning” by psychiatrist and Auschwitz survivor Viktor Frankl. I was struck by his description of an awe experience that took place shortly after he was liberated from a concentration camp. So were the authors of the white paper, who included it in their work.

Frankl wrote: “One day, a few days after the liberation, I walked through the country past flowering meadows, for miles and miles, toward the market town near the camp. Larks rose to the sky and I could hear their joyous song. There was no one to be seen for miles around; there was nothing but the wide earth and sky and the larks’ jubilation and freedom of space. I stopped, looked around and up to the sky – then I went down on my knees. At that moment there was very little I knew of myself or of the world – I had but one sentence in mind – always the same: ‘I called to the Lord from my narrow prison and He answered me in the freedom of space.’

“How long I knelt there and repeated this sentence memory can no longer recall. But I know that on that day, in that hour, my new life started.” (pg. 89, Beacon Press edition)

Dacher Keltner, PhD, a psychology professor at UC Berkeley, developed more recent research, which he wrote about in a book “Awe: The New Science of Everyday Wonder.” As reported in the September 2023 issue of Real Simple magazine, he and his colleagues found that awe is very good for you. It results in:

  • Improved concentration
  • More rigorous thinking
  • Better community connection
  • Relief of depression and anxiety
  • Less inflammation in our bodies

Transformative awe produces lasting changes in people. More than 20 percent said the experience changed their connection with God, the white paper said. Awe also created a small-self effect, humility and a sense of connection with other people. Studies also show an inverse relationship between awe and materialism.

Ways To Increase Awe in Your Life

I’ve found that increasing the level of awe in my life helps to build my relationship with God. I learn more about the reality of God, which changes my own reality.

Keltner had suggestions for increasing the level of awe in our lives. I’m amending those ideas for Christians who already practice the presence of God using mindfulness and contemplation. For us, God is everywhere … from nature to music, from wisdom to morality. We can incorporate any of these ideas into our rules of life to bring in more opportunities for awe.

  • Volunteer your time to help others.
  • Listen to praise music as you get ready each morning.
  • Explore the psalms and other Scripture glorifying God through fixed hour prayer.
  • Enjoy walking meditation or forest bathing (Keltner calls it an awe walk).

Keitner’s team also prescribed “microdosing mindfulness.” As many of us practice mindfulness on a near-continual basis, this should be easy. We just do as we always do.

  • Pay complete attention to what you see or do.
  • Invite God into the situation.
  • Love the people in front of you.
  • Praise God for His awesomeness in the situation.

Because awe is in decline in many church experiences, we can create our own moments of awe. With our help, we may be able to spread this attitude of reverence back to our Christian community.

by Karen Twinem

How to Put Aside Anxiety

"Do not look forward to the changes and chances of this life in fear; rather look at them with hope that, as they arise, God, whose you are, will deliver you out of them ... the same everlasting God who cares for you today, will take care of you tomorrow, and every day, either by shielding you from suffering, or by giving you strength to bear it. Be at peace, then, and put aside all anxious thoughts."

Francis de Sales
thankful grateful blessed in script
by Karen Twinem

This Thanksgiving Write Down Your Blessings

Parts of the world are at war. We may be missing loved ones. And the cost of Thanksgiving may be much higher than last year. Nonetheless, the Lord has been so good to us.

Today, let’s look with intention at what’s right and how God has blessed us. Listing our blessings helps us to stay focused on what is good in our lives. You can write it on a piece of paper, a computer screen or a pumpkin!

For example, I am thankful to the Lord for:

  • MRIs and CAT scans that finally show what’s wrong that can be fixed.
  • Our marriage that has remained solid despite everything.
  • Food, water and a warm house.
  • My granddaughter and the miracles of technology that allow us to spend time together.
  • My wonderful kids.
  • A more consistent Christian mindfulness practice.
  • My spiritual director, small group leaders and pastors.

And there’s lots more on my list. Please make one yourself and spend time thanking God for what you have. You will feel much better.

It might be fun to keep it, so you can compare it to next year’s list.

You also can create a list of unanswered prayers to compare. This year I am praying for healing, increased understanding of God’s will and visiting my family.

You also can make a gratitude pumpkin for your table! Just list your blessings on a pumpkin. It’s fun.

by Karen Twinem

RESOURCE: MINDFULNESS AND SLEEP

“Mindfulness and Sleep: How to improve your sleep quality through practicing mindfulness” is a British book packed with good ideas for a good night’s sleep.

Author Anna Black believes that mindfulness meditation helps us to become accept wakefulness in the night. By reducing anxiety, we can sleep … or not … with a quiet mind. A Harvard study backs up this idea because mindfulness helps to invoke the relaxation response.

The book contains about 25 exercises to improve sleep quality. For example, “Checking Your Posture” is a practice done during the day to establish the relaxed posture that helps sleep. You can stand or sit while you check your posture with eyes open or shut. Put both feet on the floor. Place your hands in a cupped position in your lap. Slowly run your attention from the soles of your feet through your ankles, calves, knees, thighs and pelvis. Then go to the base of the spine and run your attention up to the head. Keep adjusting your posture as needed.

The author has many good suggestions, including doing a body scan on only your hand and doing a slow, steady body outline while you are lying down.

I would add a Jesus prayer or a breath prayer while doing these small moves to deepen the relaxation and build your rest in Jesus.

This book has 4.3 out of 5 stars on Amazon. Other resources for Christian mindfulness are found here.

by Karen Twinem

Ignore Your Inner Critic

Do you remember a time when you were told who you are? It’s nice to hear that you’re kind or smart. But sometimes you hear that you are clumsy, stupid, ungrateful or worthless.

Where do those names go? Yes, they are still in your head. And often they become part of the inner critic who doesn’t like much of what you do. Today’s Christian mindfulness exercise is helping us to recognize that your inner critic is talking and to learn how to stop listening to it.

It is all part of detachment, the art of experiencing feelings without allowing them to control you. Numbing out feelings is unhealthy. That’s not what I’m suggesting. Detachment steps in to allow us to make choices about our thoughts and actions. In Christian mindfulness, we allow ourselves to walk with Jesus and to do God’s will.

Learning to focus on the presence of God helps us to recognize the negative impact of our inner critic. We do what we should do, regardless of how we feel. This allows us to be loving to people we don’t like and to participate in situations where we have felt awkward in the past. We can do hard things with hard people.

The first step is to pray. Ask God to help you listen to your thoughts. Spend some time writing down what you hear. Are you getting criticism and ridicule? That’s the inner critic. Be aware of what the inner critic sounds like. Keep a list of what you hear, if that helps. These hurtful statements from the past have little to do with your identity in Christ.

Once we recognize our inner critic’s voice, we need to deliberately ignore it. When the words arise, pray before you take any action. Ask for an increase in God’s presence. And turn your thoughts towards praise and gratitude. Then do the next right thing.

Ignoring your inner critic can help you to detach from emotional reactions and walk in the ways of peace.

by Karen Twinem

Think: It Could Be the Last Time

My former boss died last week. I worked for her for 13 years. She taught me how to be a communications strategist, how to embrace New York, and how to deal with difficult people without losing your cool. We went through her divorce, the deaths of her parents, my son’s disability, and the deaths of my father and sister-in-law. I have many good memories and a little sadness from difficult times.

The last time I saw her was at a Christmas party just before the pandemic. She was busy with a client, and I needed to leave. So I stood near her, waiting for an opening. It was brief. I gave her a hug and wished her well. I don’t remember what she said to me. It was the last time I saw one of the most monumental people in my life.

Sometimes we are fully conscious that we are saying goodbye to a loved one. It was so at my dad’s deathbed when they took him off a ventilator. My mother, brother, sister and I watched him take his last breath in full awareness of the finality of the moment.

But those times are rare.

This Christian mindfulness exercise helps us be less cavalier about seeing your loved ones. It’s simple: Just remind yourself that this could be the last time you talk to them. This sounds like Debbie Downer created the exercise, but it also helps you to be more aware of the person. After all, death comes to 100% of us, and not always in the order we were expecting.

We are often distracted, particularly around our family. We half-listen. We get annoyed. We don’t recognize how important every interaction is. I even think this colors our reaction when we lose someone to death. I wish I’d known … I wish I’d said … I wish we’d gotten past this.

Try listening to a loved one with the idea that it could be the last time. It makes the future better.

by Karen Twinem

Resource: Enjoying the Presence of God

The most delightful experience I had this Lent was reading “Enjoying the Presence of God: Discovering Intimacy With God in the Daily Rhythms of Life” by Jan Johnson.

I met Jan Johnson on Zoom doing a class during 2020. Calm and funny, she seems like a person who has great insight into God. She also was a close associate of Dallas Willard, so she was well taught.

Her wonderful short book gives examples of how others have spent the day … and night … with Jesus during their ordinary circumstances. As the back cover says, “It shows that continual awareness of God is not just for the super-spiritual, but that anyone can sense His companionship in the mundane, in-between moments of life.”

Easy and quick to Read, Yet Profound

The contents are divided into three sections: Moments to Turn Over, Skills to Develop and Questions to Ponder. The first chapter is “Trying Too Hard,” which has been a serious problem for me. I have tried to practice the presence of God by talking to him continually, which gets tiresome, I’d guess, to both of us.

Jan Johnson talks about weaving prayer into activities and praying without words. She also dispenses good advice about asking God questions and addressing our deeper fears, including coming to believe that God actually loves us.

For example, in the chapter “Hearing God,” she writes, “Continual conversation with God means that there are moments when God speaks and we listen. Even though it may be scary to think of God speaking to us, it is normal and not weird.” Some of those ways include:

  • Recurring thoughts
  • New ideas
  • Fictional characters
  • Works of art
  • Kinesthetic experiences
  • Journaling

I’m not alone in loving this book. It has an average 4.41 star rating with 150 readers on GoodReads and a 4.9 star average rating with 87 readers on Amazon. Trust me. This book can change your walk with God.